Retroactive Reviews: Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children Complete

Well, it finally happened. My Xbox 360 just experienced the coveted Red Ring of Death.

I’ve been a 360 owner for about 2 years, so I was well aware of the RRoD issue, but I still believed that I would be the exception to the rule.

But it seems that it’s an inevitable fate that all 360 owners will go through. Amazing that Microsoft has yet to address such a ridiculous flaw, or perhaps it’s cheaper for them to just receive bricked consoles and apply the quick repair patch. Even so, it’s still pretty silly that no other console carries such a flaw.

And I hadn’t even received my data transfer cable in the mail yet, to transfer the data from my paltry 20gb HDD to my recently purchased 120gb one. Why won’t they just include the cables with the hard drives?

Sigh…Microsoft.

That was just one of several strings of bad luck that have happened to me this week, but hopefully the worst is over. In the meantime, I’ve been quit overdue in my report on Advent Children: Complete.

So let’s get started on that. This particular review hasn’t been made for any specific website, and is just a personal write-up that I’m doing.

Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children Complete

When I had first learned about the announcement that Final Fantasy VII would finally get a sequel, via a CG movie, I literally went nuts. The original game remains one of my all-time favorite RPGs, with what is quite possibly my favorite story, setting, and characters.

Which is why I despised the ending so very much. Sure, lots of people applaud the game for taking a “unique” and “open-ended” approach, leaving the fate of Cloud and friends to our own interpretation, but I’m one of the few who saw it as an indication that the developers had run out of time and money; After spending 50 some hours with FFVII’s main characters, journeying with them, laughing with them, crying with them, the lack of a proper epilogue to assure us that they made it out okay felt like a real slap in the face. No amount of fanfiction or fan speculation would fill this void, and considering how Final Fantasy VII remained consistently popular and consistently debated many years afterward, I wasn’t alone in my hopes that Square would one day revist FFVII’s world.

So, once again, I was overcome with joy when I learned about Advent Children, and that hype only increased more and more with every new trailer, the revamped character designs for Tifa, Yuffie and the other party members, and the myseterious but seriously cool looking new villains.

Like all Square-related titles, however, Advent Children soon brought out the anger out of people along with the joy. The movie had been criticized as a mindless action flick, devoid of story or character interaction in favor of glorified fanservice action.

Well, that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. Advent Children was never meant to be the epilogue that many people wished for, but rather a re-introduction. With three more spinoffs already planned, it looked like the world of Final Fantasy VII would finally continue, and an action-packed CG movie wasn’t a bad way to start.

But with the release of Advent Children: Complete on Blu Ray, we now have a film with stylish action and an engaging story. That’s right, while most “director’s cuts” of movies merely focus on adding more action scenes, Nomura and his team decided to use their return to the drawing board to take their time and tell a story, rather than fast forward right to the action.

“Fast Forward” is precisely the term I would use for the original movie, and it only takes the first 15 minutes of Complete to see what an improvement the new footage makes. The city of Edge is no longer a backdrop that viewers only have ten seconds to take in, but is now a sprawling city that is constantly under construction, full of citizens who no longer live on upper or lower plates, but must all live together as one unified class. Geostigma is no longer an unexplainable disease that looks like charcoal that got smeared on the kids, but is now a deadly, often graphic illness that looks like something out of Resident Evil, and we are now shown what happens to people who are on their last stages of infection. Kadaj and his brothers are no longer a trio of Sephiroth cosplayers who showed up out of nowhere, but now have additional dialog and motivations that explain why they’re attacking one person or raiding another place.

I think the one scene that easily shows the difference between the two cuts is the conversation between Cloud and Rufus; the original conversation barely lasted two minutes, and mainly consisted of “Hey Cloud, there’s a guy named Kadaj doing bad stuff. Please stop him”. Now, the conversation lasts much longer, bringing people up to speed on the last two years, as well as potentially stating the stage for future entries in the Compilation.

But it isn’t just dialog that carries these new scenes, but the facial expressions as well. AC’s CG work is still gorgeous, and now the tech is being used to convey a variety of emotions, from anger to sadness, and the tears resulting from both. The best new moment, in my opinion, is Denzel’s flashback to when he first meets Cloud. Even though this scene is already covered in the standalone anime (more on that below), the AC:C version is still powerful, using a haunting version of FFVII’s main theme, as well as the aforementioned facial expressions that  elevate Denzel beyond “some kid that came out of nowhere” and turns him into someone you might genuinely care about, especially since he brings about a tender side of Cloud that was thought to be lost.

Indeed, the theme of “moving on” that was the basis of the original movie is much more prominent in this cut. Cloud’s inner pain is further explained through his interactions as well as some additional flashbacks, and coupled with the existing footage, leads to an ending that may tug at fans’ heartstrings, even if the original cut already succeeded in doing so.

But it isn’t just the new scenes that make up AC:C. The original scenes have been touched up as well, with some new details including physical damage (Tifa is now covered in dirt and bruises after her famous battle with Loz, and other characters share similar damaged features including blood), newly sampled or added music (including Anxious Heart and Crazy Motorcycle Chase), and even some redubbed dialog (Marlene and Denzel have been recast from scratch, and both do an admittedly better job than their previous voices. New lines have been squeezed into existing scenes as well). The new scenes merge with the original moments so fluidly, you might not notice the changes without having watched the original numerous times.

Nomura had mentioned that Advent Children: Complete is staying true to its name, as he has now added everything that he wanted to in the film. That said, there are still a few scenes here and there that could have used some further expanding, but remain untouched; Cloud’s conversation with Vincent, for instance, still sounds a bit ackward and is paced rather slowly, while even more unfortunate is that Yuffie, Red XIII, and the other party members aren’t given any new scenes or dialog whatsoever, with the exception of a new introduction for Cid and a quick scene with Cait Sith. Tifa, meanwhile, does have some new scenes and dialog, including another brief but satisfying demonstration of her awesome martial art abilities, but for fans of her and Cloud’s relationship (myself included), nothing new is added. Well, there is one brief moment that I felt was a terrific touch, and further expands on some of the messages conveyed in the original game’s ending as well as Advent Children’s main theme, but I don’t want to give it away.

As for the final showdown between Cloud and you-know-who, you may have read comments over how the battle has been extended, and is even more intense than before. While this is indeed true, the additions to the already chaotic battle only occur near the end. However, it certainly does expand the battle to new levels of brutality (again, no spoilers), and has more than a few added fanservice moments that will become immediately obvious to fans.

Special Features are mostly paltry carryovers from the DVD cut of AC, but the most notable extra is Episode: Denzel. An anime adaption of the Case of Denzel short story, this feature focuses on Denzel during specific moments in FFVII’s story (namely, the attack on Sector 7, the final day of the Meteor’s arrival, and the events following after), showcasing the many perils of his life that leads to his eventual adoption by Cloud and Tifa. The feature is a talkie, which might upset those who preferred Last Order’s fast paced action, but it does an effective job on showing the struggles that Midgar’s residents had to endure, from salvaging the remains of their city as well as putting aside the tensions between the upper and lower plate citizens. The animation is done by a different studio than Last Order, and while the latter did a flawless job of adapting Nomura’s artwork, the style used for Episode: Denzel is still great as well, offering a different but acceptable look for mainstay characters (despite their brief screentime) as well as Midgar’s citizens and architecture. It’s a very well done feature, and as an anime fan I can only hope that there will be more FFVII-related works in the future, including adaptions of the other short stories.

While it might not immediately change everyone’s perspective of the feature as a whole, there is no doubt that the changes and additions to Advent Children have greatly improved the movie. No longer is the film a guilty pleasure full of action, but is now a competent tale that balances its over the top action along with its emotional weight. It’s something that should be experienced by every Final Fantasy VII fan, and is a great sendoff for the beloved series.

Except the story isn’t over yet. We can only hope the next entry can carry on the high note established by this film along with the recent Crisis Core game on PSP.

10,000 Hits

10,000 hits, and counting.

For veteran bloggers, that number probably isn’t very impressive. And yet, I’m sure most guys starting out on their blog have experienced a small amount of self satisfaction for creating content interesting enough for total strangers to keep checking on.

Seriously, thank you guys. You rock.

And I promised I would unveil something special for reaching this milestone, didn’t I? If I had hit 10,000 hits two weeks ago, I wouldn’t have anything for you guys, but it just so happens that I’ve recently decided to take part in a new project. And now I’m going to tell you what it is.

I’m sure most of you heard about this game called Final Fantasy VII.

Good game.

An RPG classic. Hasn’t aged very well, especially in the visual and dialogue department, but people still love it, and we’re still checking every major event for the day a remake is announced.

Then there’s the PC version, ported by Eidos.

Possibly not the last time you'll see the Square and Eidos logos in the same box.

It offers a slight resolution boost, and fixes a fair amount of the grammar issues from the PS1 version (as well as censoring most of the swears), but it’s an absolute pain in the ass to get running, especially on Vista. It also has a midi soundtrack that is so bad, you’d need a word worse than “inferior” to describe it. But there are ways to fix that.

Anyway, most PC games have a dedicated mod community attached to them, but I’ve never really seen any groups for FFVII. Weird, right? It’s such a popular game and all.

Well, one particular group came to my attention. I was also surprised by many of their programs, which can be used to edit several different things in the original game.

There, I had discovered Loveless, a program that allows you to edit the entire script, word by word. So, after “acquiring” a copy of FFVII on the PC, I downloaded the program and ran it. I was curious just how complex it would be to edit all that text.

Frankly, I was shocked at how easy it was.

The program breaks down all the text by location; Open up the path in the train car, for instance, and you get all the dialog that takes place in that area, including when Cloud first boards it and when he makes a return trip later. Editing the text is as simple as typing, copying, and pasting, and you can even resize the text boxes as well as adding extra lines. In short, you could make conversations much longer than originally intended.

Well….I’m sure you can figure out where I’m going with this.

FFVII has a really dodgy translation. And as far as I know, no one has ever done a rewrite of the script, like some people have done with the previous SNES era Final Fantasies.

So as a result, I’m going to be the man who does it.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I present the birth of a new category.

Final Fantasy VII: Re-imagined

As a self proclaimed lover of the series and especially of it’s seventh entry, I have taken it upon myself to rewrite the entire FFVII script. By doing this, I hope to create a new localization that is not only more legible, but also more consistent with Square Enix’s current standards.

But what I’m planning goes beyond simply touching up any grammatical errors. I am also planning to touch up the dialogue, practically rewriting certain lines entirely, but making sure that the original context of the script is kept intact.

But the one thing I plan to especially focus on is character detail; The original script did a commendable job of defining our favorite characters, but I have decided to add further bits of interactions and quirks to diversify them even further.

But in addition to create a more dramatic reading, I also plan to add my own style of humor, whenever applicable. The townspeople, in particular, will offer the broadest room for creativity, as much of what they say tends to be either stilted and dry, or just outright makes no sense (perhaps something lost in the translation).

Of course, I also plan to add a few pop culture references, as well as a few internet memes and in-jokes. Rest assured, though, that I won’t be going overboard with it, lest I end up turning this into a Working Designs localization.

As for any dramatic changes, any revisions I make will be done to help achieve a better understanding of the conflicts taking place in FFVII’s world. This includes a better wording of the more complex plot points, an added bit of foreshadowing and introductory moments, and perhaps even a couple of nods to the Compilation sequels and prequels.

To top things off, here’s a small FAQ I’ve thought up, based on questions from various sources and people.

Is this a complete retranslation of FFVII?

No. Let me set the record straight that I don’t know a lick of Japanese, much less translating it. I’ve tried searching for an online script that has translated the game accurately, but that doesn’t seem to exist. What I’m doing is taking the original NA localization and polishing it up from there. I realize this means that the finished project won’t end up as a 100% accurate interpretation of the original script, but that’s not what I’m aiming for. I’m basically reimagining FFVII in my own words.

Isn’t this basically fanfiction?

In some ways, it is. I don’t want to say I’m a cut above the average fanfiction writer…..no, actually, I will say that. I’ve thought for a long while what improvements I would make to FFVII’s script, and I’ve read plenty of fanfiction attempts to know what works and what doesn’t. Basically, I’m completely confident that what I write will meet the standards that people would expect from an acceptable localization. It’s up to each of you to believe that I can pull it off.

Why not just turn this into a straight parody?

Well, first off, I’m not that funny. Trying to think up humorous moments throughout the entire script would prove rather maddening, and I won’t take the easy internet route by adding a bunch of memes, LOLs, and OMGs throughout. Also, I’m too much of a fan to find myself bashing the entire story from start to finish. I do have a few plans to poke fun at a few elements along with the more bizarre plot developments, but all of it will be done with restraint. If you’d rather see a parody, the tools are available to you should you wish to attempt it.

Why do this when a remake is practically around the corner?

I appreciate your optimism. I firmly believe a remake will happen, but I couldn’t tell you exactly when such an announcement will occur. Even if it were announced this year (I’ll keep hoping along with the rest of you), I wouldn’t immediately abandon this project. I still want to leave my personal mark in the FFVII series, to create a revision that people will (hopefully) enjoy and talk about even when the remake is available for purchase.

Are you only editing the script, or will you make some technical changes as well?

In addition to the in-game dialogue, I’m also making changes to the names of spells and items, in order to conform to current FF standards. Using a program named Teioh, I am able to edit the names of every spell, ability, weapon, and items in the game.

Using this, I will change the spell names to reflect the current (and correct) naming schemes, namely the -ara and -aga affixes instead of the I, II, and III scheme used in older games. Also, in addition to renaming certain weapons and accessories (Organics=Ogre Nix), I plan to add a personal touch to certain key items by adding descriptions for them. This, of course, is another way to add in some context, or little nods to the updated canon.

Is there anything you won’t be able to rewrite?

A few things, unfortunately. For one, it seems impossible to edit any dialogue that occurs during battles (namely boss fights like Reno and Rufus). I also won’t be able to edit any dialog occurring in FMV scenes, which means the ending will have to be left as is (though even my edits can’t really improve that mess of an ending, either way). It also appears that I won’t be able to edit Cloud’s materia tutorial.

What are you going to do about the swearing?

First off, I’m going to remove all instances of censorship (namely the %@#%$!), as it looks quite silly. But also keep in mind that I’m going to cut down on the swearing as well. I want to make the swearing more notable, like if someone calls another person by a swear, it actually registers as something personal. Of course, Cid will still retain much of his sailor talk, but I plan to help you understand the difference on when he’s swearing just for fun, and when he’s doing it because he wants to truly insult the person. Also, there won’t be any F-bombs, despite some people swearing that a couple were present in the Japanese script.

You mentioned diversifying the characters more. Could you elaborate?

Basically, I’m going to work to give each and every character their own voice and identify. For the most part, this was already done in the original dialog, but I want to add a bit more personal touches to make each character stand out. Tifa and Aerith, for instance, have often been critiqued for sounding pretty much the same. I’m adding some touches so that you can sense a notable difference between the two, how they react to situations and so forth. The same goes for Barret and Cid; I’m cutting down on the former’s swearing and giving him some additional quirks so he doesn’t seem like a carbon copy of the latter.

So does that mean Barret’s ebonics are out?

They won’t be removed entirely, but they will be cut down severely. It was funny in the 90’s, but now it’s just an embarrassing stereotype.

But what about “I pity da fool!”? You have to work that in somewhere.

I’ve already found a place for it. I’m sure you’ll be pleased.

What about “This guy are sick.”? That’s a classic!

The bad news is that Aerith won’t be saying that anymore. But, due to popular demand, I will rework the line somewhere else. I can’t think of any way to include it without making it an intentional misspelling, but I suppose most of you won’t mind.

Wait, you’re calling her Aerith? It’s Aeris!!

No it isn’t. Besides, you can name her whatever you want. I don’t think there’s a way to change the default names anyway.

You’re Tifa-biased, aren’t you? That means you’re not going to give Aerith/s fair treatment! She’s Cloud’s true love and you know it!!

I won’t hide it, I do vastly prefer Tifa over Aerith. However, I am going to give both girls equal treatment, and in all honesty I might have more fun rewriting Aerith (more details to come in future posts). But as much as you Aerith fans like to deny it, there does exist a romantic element between Cloud and Tifa in the later half, and it’s even been confirmed in multiple sources/compilation project that they’re official. I’m not going to destroy that subtlety with any new lines, but I am going to make my own touches into one of my favorite romances in a videogame (as well as Disc 2’s touching scene in the hill).

Please, no Gackt references.

No promises.

Are you going to edit anything else, such as the graphics or music?

I’ve just been made aware of the mods released for FFVII on the PC. I’ve yet to successfully implement any changes into the game besides my rewrite. At the moment, it’s best if you check out the mod board yourself. I could potentially release a torrent containing the revamped game and the rewritten script, but something like that will probably only occur once the script is released. I don’t want to delay things further because of other technical issues.

So when will this be released?

I don’t want to list a solid release date. It entirely depends how much effort I put into this on a weekly basis, and also if I succumb to writer’s block (it’s a horrible condition). I want to optimistically say “within the year”, but that’s really a self assurance. I hate to think it’ll take any longer than that. At the very least, I should have it ready before the remake….

So how will I play this?

All of FFVII’s text is contained in a certain file. Supposedly, all you have to do is replace that file with the revised one that I’ll put up. I’ll create a small .txt file with instructions, so you remember to back up your original text file in case you want to revert back to the old translation.

Will this work on the PSX version?

Nope, PC version only. If there’s ever a way to edit the text in the PSX version, I might edit that as well, but I can’t imagine it would be as easy as this.

Can I beta test this?

You sure can. I’m planning to release a “demo” soon. I’m trying to rewrite all the dialogue up to when Cloud falls after his battle with the Airbuster boss (and right before he meets Aerith). From there, I’ll be awaiting any feedback or suggestions, so I can move forward as planned.

Can I offer some suggestions on the dialog?

Absolutely. If you’ve got any ideas for a particular scene or NPC, just send me your ideas. If I like it, I’ll add it and find some way to credit you for it (sadly, I won’t be able to edit the credits. Too bad, I would’ve liked to have my name displayed).

Will you do any other projects after this one?

Probably not. There really isn’t anything else I have an interest in rewriting. I’ve been somewhat curious what I could do with a Xenogears rewrite, but that would prove absolutely maddening. That game probably has three times more text than FFVII.

Jawsome Japanimation: Final Fantasy

When I originally worked on this post, over a week and a half ago, I had opened up with a comment about how my thumb was aching from too much Street Fighter IV, and that I was too cheap to invest in a Madcatz Fightpad controller.

One week later, the opening already became obsolete, as I ended up buying a controller after all (Blanka model. I really wanted Ryu, but it was all they had, and they were quite scarce at the time, so apples and oranges). So now that I’ve updated this opening accordingly, let’s proceed with the rest of the article.

Last time, I talked about the various animated adaptions of Street Fighter. Today, I’ll be talking about Final Fantasy, and its various animated adaptions.

It’s going to be a short list.

Sadly, the FF series has very little anime adaptions, which is a crying shame considering that it should be a cinch to bring the various worlds and characters to life. It would also fill in a much needed void for more fantasy-based anime. Sure, there’s Lodoss War, Escaflowne, and The Slayers, but after that there isn’t much to write about.

When word hit me that there was indeed a Final Fantasy anime (around the time I started getting into the series with FFVI, called FFIII during the SNES days), I grew anxious to learn more. All I had at the time was a small blurb in EGM (or was it their failed side-mag? I forget) as well as a couple of pictures. The internet wasn’t available at the time, so I was left wondering about this foreign relic for several years; we got the Street Fighter II movie, but this mysterious FF anime looked to stay exclusive to Japan.

At least until Urban Vision (who I think is defunct now) released it as one of their first dubbed VHS tapes. I was quite excited to finally see this thing in action, but I was also keeping the notion that maybe there was a reason it wasn’t released right away….

Final Fantasy: Legend of the Crystals

Notice how they cover their tracks with that "Based On" part.

Taking place 500 years after Final Fantasy V (which would take even longer to arrive in NA, under the “Final Fantasy Anthology” collection on PS1, and it took even longer than that to play FFV with a good translation), an evil force is stealing the crystals of Planet R (don’t quote me on whether that’s canon) for evil.

It’s up to hot-headed motorcyclist/swordmaster Pretz….

"Hmm, the crystal of the Wind. Fascinating. Fascinating."

And the cute but incredibly naive Summoner Linali to solve this mystery.

"Ooh, she's pretty."

I’ll just get right to the point: This is a very bizarre adaption of Final Fantasy. Much like Street Fighter Alpha: Generations, this is what happens when you hire a director who’s more into the “artsy” side of Japanimation, and is asked to adapt a popular game series that was doing just fine without his “creative liberties”.

The designs for the two main characters are fine, pretty much standard FF fare, but everyone else and the world around them suffers from some weird Dune-esque stylings. You’ve got Chocobos who look like they had all their feathers plucked, hulking goblin creatures with the largest pair of manboobs you’ll ever see outside of Fight Club (at least I hope those are moobs; it’s much more disturbing to think they’re female), alien robots that speak a completely made up language (but whose boss communicates to them in English, sort of like Jabba the Hutt in reverse), and several other oddities.

The actions of the characters and the plot surrounding them is even stranger. Pretz and Linali manage to secure the Wind Crystal, which immediately decides to hide itself inside Linali’s butt.

No, Seriously.

Oh, Japan.

Then there’s the fact that both characters are incredibly suicidal in nature; Pretz plays chicken with someone pointing a gun right at him, while Linali has a tendency to make literal leaps of faith, by jumping from areas that she seriously shouldn’t attempt jumping from.

Now that's improvising.

There’s also the main villain. In addition to his butt ugly underlings, he’s also one of the most impractical looking villains out there, even worse than Ex-Death’s tree form at the end of FFV.

His name is Ra-Devil, and his robot form here is Deathguynos. And I thought Ex-Death was cliche.

His master plans are just as perplexing; Taking the brain from the recently deceased Cid from FFV (because brains don’t rot once the person dies, right?), Ra-Devil plants the brain underneath his robot stomach and increases it five times its normal size, in order to absorb its “knowledge” of the crystals. Once he finally receives the crystals, he undertakes his “God form”, which results in him looking like a plate of leftover lasagna. If it was an homage to Tetsuo’s mutation in Akira, at least the former had a semblance of shape to it; Ra-Devil’s form is basically a bunch of mush that shoots electricity. I should stop making fun of Ex-Death’s final form as a result. I won’t, but I should.

Some of the weirdness pays off, though. One particularly memorable character, Valkus, bears more than a few resemblances character-wise to FFIX’s Steiner. I wouldn’t be surprised if he served as some sort of inspiration to the hot-headed, overly loyal soldier, especially because they also share a love interest with the respective bad girls of both iterations.

Also, that isn't a moustache, those are his nose hairs. That is hard core, man.

I also thought it was amusing how the background characters all resembled one another; I’d like to think that was a jab at Final Fantasy’s soldiers and townspeople all looking alike, just as how the Pokemon series poked fun at the hundreds of Nurse Joys and Officer Jennys of the world.

Truth be told, Legend of the Crystals is pretty entertaining, if you’re willing to forgive the fact that it’s supposed to be an FF anime. The animation is quite nice, there’s quite a few amusing situations here (thanks to the fact that the characters take a batshit insane approach to everything), and the dub is actually one of the best dubbed animes I’ve ever heard. Featuring recogonizble voice actors, mostly from the Tenchi Muyo series (Tenchi, Sasami, Washu), Urban Vision always did a great job with their english efforts, with their delivery and localization exceeding the original Japanese versions.

Also, fun fact: every single english VA from this series is used in Final Fantasy X, mostly as bit parts (Shelinda, Claska, Yunalesca, Luzzu). Another fun fact is that Linali’s Japanese voice played Tifa in Ehrgeiz.

Finally, for those who played through FFV, the original heroes do make a couple of appearances, mostly in flashback, ghostly form.

Looking back, I don't think Galuf was that tall. Or that buff.

Faris even appears with her bare breast exposed in one sequence, probably meant to symbolize how she’s actually a woman underneath her male disguise. Or maybe it was a bizarre, artsy attempt at fanservice. You know, aside from Linali’s glowing panties.

Final Fantasy Unlimited

False advertising, in every way imaginable.

When I had heard that a new FF anime series was being produced, I was overjoyed; even more so because Gonzo was the studio behind it, and at the time their pedigree was quite prestigious (especially with Last Exile, a wonderfully big budget epic that was very close to an FF adaption as copyright allowed).

That joy quickly faded away once the opinions started appearing online. Now to be fair, I haven’t watched this series aside from the first episode from a Newtype USA DVD (RIP), but that was enough to convince me that most of the negativity of Unlimited was spot on. That might sound unfair, and I still may end up watching the series in its entirety one day….but I’d much rather not put myself through it.

I haven't seen a pair of mountains that big since ten seconds ago!

For one thing, Gonzo must have been paid in chocobo feed, because the animation in this show is anything but “big budget”; Characters are drawn in this weird, flat style with absolutely no shadowing, and their appendages (especially their noses) have a habit of vanishing in one frame but reappearing in another. At least Legend of the Crystals had a consistent animation style. FFU’s animation simply looks unfinished.

At least they got one thing right.

As for the characters, they stray very far from the Final Fantasy norm, which might sound like a good thing to some, but that doesn’t make them compelling in any way. The two main kids, Ai and Yu (wonder if the twist involves them having a long lost triplet named Mii?), aren’t very memorable from any other brother and sister character you’ve seen elsewhere, aside from the fact that they seem to love screaming “WONDERLAND” several times per episode.

But hey, Chocobos are actually yellow this time, so that’s a plus. The Cid in this adaption is also a young man, which is also an interesting idea were it not for his rather creepy obsession with his airship (which he calls “Darling” in a less-than-healthy tone).

And then there’s Lisa….

It's a kid's show.

When people critique Tifa’s look in Final Fantasy VII, I’m always on the defensive side; I can’t find myself doing the same for Lisa here. Take a look at some of the show’s artwork (including that image I posted a bit back during Dissidia’s Do’s and Dont’s…you know the one), and it’s more than obvious that her inclusion was meant to lure in the adult crowd. It also doesn’t help that her personality, most of the time, is that of a complete ditz. This later turns out to be a bit of a facade, but I don’t exactly see the point in masquerading as a clueless bimbo to a pair of ten year olds.

She’s also supposed to act as a surrogate mother to Ai and Yu, but I get a much creepier vibe than that….

This shot is used to represent the children's longing for a nurturing mother. Also, boobies.

I've also noticed that in many of these shots, he rarely looks at her eye to eye.

Too easy.

But if you happen to be among the “adult” demograph this show is trying to lure in, I should warn you that the promo art is about as cheesecake as it gets. Since the animation is so sporadic, Lisa’s curves are rarely represented the way the producers probably intended. You won’t find any torn clothes or Gainaxing around here (and the few times the latter occurs, it’s a sad low budget attempt).

But you will find a decent amount of soft tentacle action.

Again, it's a kid's show.

Lisa tries to remind the director that this is a kid's show.

The kids get involved in the bondage action too, but I’ll spare you the shots. Between this, the phallac-shaped monsters of the week, and the very existence of Pist (yes, that’s a character), Final Fantasy Unlimited should at least appeal to the fetish crowd, though I’m not sure that was the director’s intention. Or maybe it is, sure, let them have whatever audience they can get. It wasn’t enough, anyway, because the series was quickly cancelled, leaving the unfinished story to be released as novels and drama CDs (which are, ironically enough, also unfinished due to lackluster sales. Well, they tried).

Frankly, there’s little positive to say about Final Fantasy Unlimited. The animation is crap, the plot revolves around a monster of the week premise, there’s very few actual nods to the series it’s supposed to be adapting, and the supposed “hero” of the show, Kaze, is even more of an unfriendly doucehbag than Cloud or Squall; he shows up at the last minute of every episode to deliver the final blow to the monster, then wanders off. Rinse and repeat until your ratings plummet.

Now I am told that the final couple of episodes are actually well done, and do a strong job of conveying several of the themes that make the FF series so beloved. I still doubt it’s worth suffering through this show, when you could just be replaying your favorite moment from the games. Or watch Legend of the Crystals again; Chocobos aside, it’s closer to an FF adaption as this series ever was.

Last Order: Final Fantasy VII

“An anime adaption of Final Fantasy VII could never happen”, most fans would say.

“Yes, it can”, I’d usually reply. With the right care and budget, Square’s most popular entry in the FF series could come to animated life.

For a brief moment, during the core moment of FFVII’s big revival (that being the Japanese release of Advent Children), Square finally attempted this.

And guess what? They succeeded.

The first official signs of FFVII in animated form came from this promo commercial for Before Crisis, the Turk-centric cellphone game that is, to this day, still a Japanese exclusive (are our cellphones really that far behind Japan’s?). The promo mostly features the original characters made for BC’s story, but it also briefly shows Rufus, Rude, and Reno from the original game.

It’s nicely animated, but it’s not like a short teaser could really prove if FFVII can work in anime form. The real test came shortly afterward, with the release of a bonus half hour OVA, included with the Japanese version of Advent Children. Titled “Last Order: Final Fantasy VII”, it centered around Zack and Cloud during their escape as Hojo’s experiments, as well as flashing back to the Nibelheim Incident, the crucial point that jump starts FFVII’s story for all its characters.

Apparently his swings are so fast, enemies evaporate into dust. Awesome.

An anime adaption of Final Fantasy VII, and it focuses on my favorite moment in the whole game, the Nibelheim flashback? You can certainly bet I was excited. I repressed my desires to see Advent Children early, and decided to wait for the official NA release, but I didn’t wait long to download Last Order, especially since it was apparent Square USA wasn’t going to include it.

On closer inspection, he resembles FFVI's Sabin quite a bit. Coincidence?

This OVA did not disappoint; the events from the original game were told pretty much perfectly (minus a few changes that aren’t worth bitching about, including a quite interesting one that will be mentioned below), it gave us a look into what kind of bad-ass Zack was (he was only given about six minutes of screen-time in the original, yet that was enough to establish a big fanbase), and the animation was quite wonderful, doing an excellent job of flawlessly translating Nomura’s designs for this adaption.

All I did was google my name, and....sniff....

There was also a great amount of detail on the facial expressions, something that I feel that anime still has an edge over CG. Tifa, for instance, is especially lovely, even when filled with sadness or anger. And Sephiroth…

Oh, shit.

Sephiroth is just scary in this feature. When he’s ready to stab Tifa, the look of delight he gives off is chilling, and neatly coincides with his smirk in the original game, after he dispatches that other person during the famous event from the first disc. For people who debated whether or not Sephiroth felt any emotion whenever he massacres people, this should tell you: Yes, and he enjoyed it too.

The anime has a bit more violence and brutality than what was seen in the original game or Advent Children (at least the original cut), especially during Seph’s encounters with Zack and then Cloud. Cloud gets stabbed twice instead of just once, which makes his adrenaline rush all the more poignant (but also adds a bit of confusion, where in this version, Sephiroth willingly jumps to his doom). Strangely enough, though, Tifa doesn’t have a scratch on her after being attacked by Sephiroth. Between this and the bloodless death of that other character, I wonder if Square has some sort of policy where their female leads can’t be seen critically wounded.

Anyway, regarding the most major change in this OVA….

If this really happened, the events of the first game would have changed dramatically.

In this version, Tifa actually regains consciousness to witness young Cloud coming to her rescue. The dialog during this moment is actually taken from the original game, during Disc 2’s reunion of the two while they fell in the Lifestream. This certainly isn’t canon, since it was vitally important that Tifa would not know that Cloud really was there during the events of Nibelheim, but regardless, it’s a cute moment between the two. It was probably added to lighten the depressing moments to follow, but it’s still an appreciated touch of fanservice for fans of this coupling, and should erase any doubts about their relationship.

Episode: Denzel

Dragoon in the making?

Naturally, I was eager for more FFVII animation, and my desire came somewhat true with the announcement that Advent Children: Complete would include another OVA feature. Titled “Episode: Denzel”, this feature is an adaption of the “Case of Denzel” short story that was part of the “On the Way to a Smile” series of novellas. It’s also being animated by A-1 pictures instead of Madhouse, a company I’m not familiar with, but one that I’m hoping can get the job done (they’re also doing the Valkyria Chronicles TV series, which is looking quite promising so far).

Unfortunately, I don’t share the same excitement that I did with Last Order. The reason is because Denzel’s story doesn’t feature any of the FFVII cast (though Cloud and Tifa may make an appearance at the very end), and focuses entirely on Denzel wandering the ruins of Midgar, emo’ing around until he’s eventually picked up by Cloud.

It’s especially unfortunate, because I really, really wanted “Case of Tifa” to be adapted instead. Not only is the entire cast featured, but it’s a wonderful story for fans of the original game, and has lots of dramatic, personal moments that would have been very interesting to see in animated form (including a drunk Cloud). Maybe that’s still a possibility, but until then, if you wanted to learn Denzel’s origins, but didn’t want to read a bunch of text on someone’s fansite, this anime is the way to go.

Final Fantasy in Other Media:

Considering how popular the series is, it shouldn’t be a suprise that the FF games have been referenced more than once in other animes, mangas, or TV shows.

Yuffie could only dream of having curves like that.

The manga series Genshiken features a small homage, where two of the main characters head to a cosplay convention dressed as Tifa and Yuffie, respectively. The Tifa cosplayer is embarrassed at all the attention she’s getting, as she’s quite a dead-on looker for the character. I’m not too familiar with this series, so I’m uncertain if this scene made its way to the anime adaption. Regardless, it’s a funny moment, although both girls are a bit more curvaceous than they were originally designed.

Sirs and Ladies, I'm afraid your attire is not suitable to attend this party.

Another manga, Descendants of Darkness (which I know even less about) features most of teh FFVII cast making an appearance in the background.

Whatever.

The author behind Love Hina is an unapologetic FF fan, putting in more than a few references and cameos in the manga. There’s also that rather infamous doujin by the same artist, featuring Aerith, Yuffie, and a corded telephone. I’ll just leave it at that….

Personally, I only see a vague resemblance, but whatever.

There’s also Digimon (which was a pretty decent Pokemon ripoff back in the day, but has now gathered a very disturbing group of fans), which has been theorized for years of using FF as an homage for its characters. One character, Mimi, has been considered an homage to Aerith.

I don't see the point in the boxing gloves. You'd think thorny hands would be deadly enough. Again, whatever.

A much more obvious source of inspiration is Mimi’s digimon, Togemon. Not only does it almost practically resembles FF’s beloved (hated?) cactus creature Cactuar, it even has an attack named “10,000 needles”.

Pokemon? I'd rather kill a man! Vwee hee hee hee!

And while not cited as often, I personally always saw a bit of a connection between Myotismon and Kefka. Remove the vampire mask and add some facepaint, and they’re pretty much twins.

And of course, there’s official manga adaptions related to Final Fantasy, including manga series based on Crystal Chronicles, Final Fantasy XI, and of course Kingdom Hearts, but it would take too long in this post to mention. Maybe if I’m fortunate enough to find some scanlations, I can discuss them in more detail in the future.

On the television front, there’s Robot Chicken’s FFVII Parody, which is very amusing and does a great job of capturing the quirks of the original game (midi music, weird NPC glitches, a spotty translation).

There’s also the anime series Welcome To The NHK, which features a two-parter where Sato discovers an MMORPG that is more than an obvious parody of Final Fantasy XI, right down to the opening movie.

The cameos only increase as Sato falls in love with a Mithra-inspired character, and starts having a really disturbing (and sadly, quite accurate) obsession with the online world.

Of course, any MMORPG veteren should be well aware of how this online romance will turn out.

And finally, there’s Captain N’s final episode, which places Kevin and friends into the world of Final Fantasy.

I’ve never actually seen this episode, but it’s somewhat ironic that FF ends up as the final adventure for this Nintendo-sponsored series. I won’t go and say that Square’s shift to the Playstation was the primary downfall of the Nintendo 64….but I bet it didn’t help, either.

Anyway, as far as adaptions go, I suppose they got the gist of the first game down, since it did have a prince, a witch, and an evil warlock. But as far as any resemblance to characters, it doesn’t exist. Captain N has always been guilty of taking liberties with famous videogame characters (just look at Mega Man, aka “Bobby Hill in Green Spandex”), but it doesn’t help that the show’s budget pretty much tanked by the third season.

And that concludes things. Well, there’s also a Two and a Half Men episode where Charlie Sheen’s fat-ass nephew is dying to rent the “newest Final Fantasy” (which turns out to be FFX, although once he starts playing it, the music turns out to be the battle BGM from FFII, PS1 edition), but I can’t find a clip online, and I don’t feel like putting too much effort searching for it.

So instead, I’ll leave you with this.

* Final Fantasy: Legend of the Crystal images taken from Hardcore Gaming 101

* Manga cameo images taken from FF Compendium

My Next Big Post Isn’t Ready Yet

So in the meantime, here are some pictures of a doujinshi (fan-comic) starring Tifa as a cat girl adopted by Rufus Shinra.

Japan, seriously, what is WRONG with you?